Things NOT to Say to Single People On Valentine’s Day

When you’re in love, February 14th is “Valentine’s Day.” But when you don’t have a sweetie? It’s S.A.D. a/k/a Singles Awareness Day. So if you’re happily coupled and in the midst of card and candy shopping, take a minute and remember that not everyone is as excited about this holiday. If you have a single friend, try not to make it worse by “cheering her up” with lots of hugs, shoulder pats and saying stuff like this:

  • “Don’t worry, it’s a commercial holiday, anyway.” Actually, it’s not. Yes, Hallmark has taken it over but Valentine’s Day started as a religious holiday. But it doesn’t matter if it’s commercial or not because everyone celebrates it anyway.
  • “You should try to find a date! You know, so you’re not alone.”Yeah, thanks, but no thanks.
  • “Look at all the wonderful gifts my boyfriend/girlfriend/fiancé/husband/wife brought me!” Your single friends are truly happy that you’ve found true love, but please save all your gushing until the next day. Then they’ll be excited for you and tell you how wonderful your partner is. Just give single people Valentine’s Day to sulk in darkness.
  • “I could totally set you up with someone! I know the perfect guy/girl.” No, you don’t. Or you would have brought them up on ANYother day. You’re just trying to arrange a pity date and nobody wants your pity, especially on Valentine’s Day.
  • “This must be so hard for you.” Gee, thanks for pointing that out. And it must be cool to be so nice that you had to point that out.
  • “You’re lucky you’re not in a relationship like me!” This is a backhanded compliment to both the single folks and your partner? Wow.
  • “Have you tried Tinder/OkCupid/eHarmony?” Wow! You’re a genius. Not really.
  • “Don’t worry. I just know you’ll find that someone special.” Wasn’t worrying, but it’s good to know you can predict the future.
  • “So, wait. What are you doing on Valentine’s Day?” How considerate of you to ask. Probably something involving wine. Of course you and your loved one are welcome to join!
  • “Here’s my advice on how to find true love.” Any other day, fine. Just not on Valentine’s Day.